Sasuke Uchiha: The Rise Of Risingness That Fell Down A Bit First
by b087H3m4gICDr4g0N
Summary: Sasuke Uchiha Rises slowly then falls down a bit then rises a bit then falls a lot, and then rises quite a lot because he can do what he wants.
1. Cot of Duty

Rivulets of blood ran down from his eyes covering the young man's face in his own blood. An unyielding manic sort of laughter reverberated throughout the long hallway, ending only at the large soundproof metal doors that tried to conceal the hallway's existence from the rest of the world.

They liked to have fun here.

A visibly shaken young chunin pushed a tray-laden cart down the hall, pausing momentarily to slip the trays of plenty through the small metal hatches that stood between his meager self and some of the most dangerous criminals in the world. Eventually the young shinobi found his way to the cell of one 'Uchiha, S.' And was faced with a rather disturbing sight.

Said 'Uchiha, S.' more commonly known as Sasuke Uchiha, seemed to be bleeding from his eye sockets, the blood then travelling down his face and into his mouth which was wide open from the maniacal laughter, now mixed with a slight choking sound and the strange imagery helped convince the young chun in to stop his dawdling and continue feeding the the prisoners.

Sasuke liked his party tricks.

Scaring the new guards was just about the only thing Sasuke, or anyone else could really do for fun in their dank and dark cells. The maximum-security wing of Konoha's prison was remarkably similar to the other sections barring the fact that the entire thing was basically a giant gas chamber. Admittedly it was a pretty economical solution to ensuring 'Maximum-security' for the more dangerous inmates, And Sasuke had little doubt that at least a medium-sized army of Jonin would be required to restrain the prisoners if they managed to break their chakra seals.

Most of the prisoners surrounding him were either carrying out a life sentence or on death row with only a few exceptions. The man in the cell across him was a rapist of some renown would be out in about fifteen years or so, owing to the non-lethal nature of his crimes, though one could argue that he wouldn't have been imprisoned in the first place had he killed his victims.

Sasuke himself had only managed to escape several murder convictions thanks to the lack of hard evidence against him, and a really good lawyer. There was of course the matter of his desertion which was kind of difficult to defend, but Sasuke was a bit beyond caring about that right now given that he was only a couple of days away from finishing his comparatively short prison sentence.

His old teammates dropped by sometimes, and though he didn't exactly keep track of when they visited he was fairly sure that the frequency or lack of it thereof indicated a fading interest in him.

Not that he minded of course, though Sasuke sometimes struggled not to burst out in laughter as he watch a serial rapist with a rather violent passion for powerful kunoichi pleasure himself at the sight of a female visitor as Sasuke's pink-headed former teammate conversed with him.

"Sasuke"

He turned up from his tray of ambiguously edible slop to look at the voice coming from between the bars of his cell. It was just the group of people he was thinking of.

"Hn" Sasuke replied in his usual fashion. Most people thought that he didn't use words because he thought himself above talking to peasants or something, he was just lazy and didn't see the point in opening his mouth when all people were looking for was an acknowledgment that he had heard them.

"So I heard you were getting out in a couple days..." The pink one began before an orange blur comically forced her head to the side in order to receive Sasuke's full attention.

"Of course he's getting out, right Sasuke? and as soon as does he's going to rejoin Team Seven, isn't that right Sasuke?" The orange blur, now identified as one Naruto Uzumaki near-shouted in the incredibly cheery way that he seemed to have mastered, though the hint of a threat was not missed by the imprisoned Uchiha.

It was at this point along that Sakura decided to revenge Naruto's slight upon her using her chakra-infused fists of fury. Somehow they got away with this in a maximum security facility, Sasuke just chalked it up to their status as heroes, and their relation to the Hokage's office.

"Well it would make them happy if you came back to us as a shinobi, though I'm not sure how many else would welcome ." Kakashi was one of the few voices Sasuke had to listen to that was blunt about the reality of things. He was sure Naruto and Sakura had good intentions, but he somehow doubted the outside world was as rosy as they made it out to be. His old sensei only served to confirm his thoughts.

"Ah" In truth it never occurred to Sasuke that he could be anything but a shinobi. He might not have been one officially for nearly a decade, but nobody ever doubted that he was one.

"Well I'm sure the warden wouldn't want those two destroying his prison" The copy-nin gestured at a flying Naruto impacting a wall."And I'm sure you already know there's a re-enlistment process-" Kakashi was interrupted by an orange blur whizzing between Kakashi and Sasuke's cell towards the exit, followed closely by a screaming - no, shouting red-pink blur.

"Bye Sasuke-teme!" Naruto's voice echoed from down the long hallway.

"Well, see you in a few days Sasuke." Kakashi sighed as he walked off after his former students, leaving Sasuke alone with his slop and cot.

Sasuke waited until he heard the heavy metal doors close behind the trio of Konoha ninja before climbing into said cot and now cold ambiguous slop. Sasuke ate his food(?) and soon after fell asleep to dreams of a group of twelve-year olds and a masked man meeting on a bridge.

* * *

**Real word count: 1,018**

**This is my first Naruto fanfic so any advice would be appreciated, that said, these are not characters 'Fresh from the manga'. I'll try to keep developments well-reasoned but characters and their intentions/thoughts tend to be open to interpretation, so if you come away saying "WTF br0 y u do dat 2 da narewdoh" then now you have an explanation.**

**Have a nice day.**


	2. Iruka Is Still A Teacher

There were a lot of myths and rumors about prisons circulating amongst the public, both shinobi and civilian. Sasuke had very quickly learned that very few of them were true.

Not a single person had ever made an attempt to penetrate his posterior in the communal , and the prisoners were for the most part civil, though they did play their role in the 'Training' of new guards. This atmosphere, from what Sasuke could gather, had to do with the fact that the prison was intended and solely used for holding ninja of all stripes. The frivolous blustering and infighting present in civilian prisons was looked down upon by guard and inmate alike. They were all shinobi in one way or another, and they all knew where they stood as individuals.

That being said, the infrequent event of a release was usually handled fairly well, and Sasuke's was no special exception.

The last Uchiha simply walked down the many hallways that connected the massive facility before arriving at the front desk to retrieve his belongings and have his chakra bindings released. It was probably one of the easiest things he had ever done if he was honest, though it would end up leading to a slightly more difficult task.

Becoming a ninja again.

Technically, Sasuke was a civilian, and technically all he had to do to become a shinobi was pass an academy exam as well as a practical exam administered by a potential jonin-sensei. Technically any free citizen of Konoha could apply, and technically you didn't even have to enroll in the academy. Technically all Sasuke had to do was answer some multiple choice questions, make a henge, and jump through a couple of hoops for a jonin.

_Technically,_ Sasuke was still a civilian.

The academy stood large and welcoming as ever as ninja and children passed through the doors and around the small fields outside. Sasuke took his first step inside the building and immediately realized he was lost. Fortunately for Sasuke, there was a floor map beside the doors he came in through, unfortunately, it lacked a 'You are here' marker.

...

* * *

...

"Sasuke?"

The Uchiha turned around to see his former academy instructor poking his head around the outrageously large stack of papers he was carrying. The older man somehow managed to adjust his forehead protector without dropping anything and allowed a small grin to form on his face.

"So the famous Sasuke Uchiha is already looking to become a ninja again?"

"Ah" The Uchiha replied.

"Well, the main office is just up those stairs and to the right." Iruka motioned towards a staircase as he spoke. " I'm sure you'll be able to pass whatever tests they throw at you."

"Ah"

"Well, I've got to go get all these entrance forms filed." The academy teacher shook his head around at the wobbling tower of paper he had braced against his form. It was then that Sasuke noticed his former teacher's wild bloodshot eyes and unshaven face, truthfully, he looked quite frightening, his small grin turned to a crazed enormously toothy smile.

Sasuke decided to bid his teacher adieu and head upstairs before the stack of papers eventually collapsed on its sleep-deprived chunin handler. Sasuke was halfway up the stairs when he heard the fluttering of paper and an inhuman scream of rage.

* * *

The office was what one would expect of a ninja academy office prior to the beginning of the school ; understaffed and full of paper. There was a sign at the door with an arrow on it pointing towards a stack of papers, it read 'Academy/Ninja registration'.

'Convenient' thought the Uchiha, though he knew that it had more to do with the overworked chunin longing to not have to deal with parents who wanted to register their little heroes than anything else.

Sasuke grabbed a sheet and a cheap pen before taking a seat at one of the waiting chairs at the front of the office and began filling out his form.

**First name**

_Sasuke_

**Last name **

_Uchiha_

_..._

As he filled out his list he noticed the stares of the young mothers filling out their own forms, as well as those of the chunin that had to deal with them. Undaunted, the prodigal Uchiha continued filling out his sheet, bearing the trepid stares of the parents with all the stature that was expected of an Uchiha.

To say he looked like an ass would be an understatement.

Finishing off his form he found a myriad of tick boxes and dotted lines were all that populated the final two pages of the form, protecting the village of Konoha from its own shinobi force with more legal armour than it had actual armour.

Naturally, he signed and ticked away and before he knew it he was sitting around with no idea what to do with his completed package!

"If you have a completed form please remain seated until a chunin comes to collect them thank you for your patience" One of the chunin at the main desk drawled out in one of the most monotone and boring voices Sasuke had ever heard.

...

After waiting for what felt like hours while yet more parents arrived to register their kids for the academy, Sasuke finally felt the sweet relief of his former academy teacher's form staggering into the room with an announcement.

"If you have completed forms..." Iruka was panting heavily and somehow looked even worse than he had before, as he had inexplicably acquired numerous tears in his clothing and bruises on his face."...Please hand them to me... and I'll have them filed... AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!" Some of the parents wore mixed looks of shock and concern at the teacher's battered state. Sasuke just handed him his registration package and left.

"Bye Iruka-sensei"

* * *

**Real word count: 977**

**So this is another short chapter I put together, and I've gotta say these first chapters are turning out to be a bit difficult to write, so let me explain why.**

**In what seems like most fics people might have written this chapter like this:**

**_Sasuke was released from prison and headed to the academy to register as a ninja. While he was there he met Iruka who was very tired and overworked because it was the end of summer and school was about to start. Sasuke didn't get butt-raped in prison_.**

**Obviously nobody actually wrote that and I'm not trying to put down writers who condense things, don't get me wrong. However, what I wanted to do was flesh out the academy a bit (I also learned that the academy is pretty much THE ninja building of Konoha). Iruka is a teacher? What else does he have to do besides teach? Doesn't there have to be a registration process for new students? What does that look like? What about adults that want to be ninja? Is there a process to accomadate them? You know, that sort of thing.**

**The difficulty comes in not getting hung up on things to the point of making them boring and balancing that with showcasing the greater characterization and sort of BTS stuff that conceivably goes on in the Naruto-verse. This is the second second chapter I've written for this and I feel like it doesn't really go deep enough for my tastes. I'd really appreciate any feedback you have on the issue. Do you like the more background information and characterization of stuff like this or is this just about all you can take on that front? Obviously I'm not going to stop with it completely but I don't want it to make my story boring.**

**Anyways, reviews are appreciated and if you want me to get back to you on something or have any questions let me know, but if you don't I'll see you next chapter (...please?)**

**Also, longer chapters will be incoming if all goes to plan, so hooray.**


	3. Evil Is Easier

Upon exiting the academy Sasuke was faced with a world of options. He had applied directly to take the ninja graduation exam as opposed to 6 years of schooling simply because he already knew how to throw a kunai, perform a henge, and spell the word 'neighbourhood'.

It still amazed him how Naruto barely passed. Surely it took a lot of effort to fail something so easy. Sasuke knew it would still be week until he could take his academy exam, and it seemed that until then he would have nothing to do.

For all his life Sasuke had been working towards some kind of goal. Whether it be seeking revenge on his brother, revenge on Konoha, or even just revenge on Naruto. With no one to take revenge on, the out of work avenger was left bored out of his skull.

So he walked. Sasuke had always been something of a restless soul, and the act of sitting around doing nothing bothered him immensely. Familiarizing himself with the 'new' Konoha was still boring, but at least it was something to do.

Of course Sasuke couldn't reasonably have expected to be left alone, that would have been too easy. But at least it would liven things up a little. Sasuke had dubious pleasure of having made some very interesting acquaintances over the course of his life.

"HEY SASUKE !"

...Like that one.

"WAIT UP NARUTO!"

...Aaand that one.

Pinky and Porky were running toward him and shouting at the top of their lungs as they approached. Sasuke got the distinct impression that his day was about to be ruined.

"What's up Sasuke? I heard you signed up to take the academy exams." The blonde asked even though he seemed to already know the answer.

"How could you have possibly have known that dobe? It hasn't even been five minutes since I left." Sasuke deadpanned in order to hide his astonishment at how Naruto could have found something like that out so quickly.

"Well, my clones usually help out with the academy's paperwork this time of year. They help Iruka-sensei in getting the paperwork signed." The answer would seem innocent enough to the casual observer, but Sasuke was anything but casual.

"...Wait a minute, are you saying your clones complete registration forms for the academy?" Sasuke narrowed his eyes at Naruto.

"Well, yeah." The blonde was nervous. Nobody had been on the receiving end of the famed Uchiha Cop-Stare* for over a decade.

"Naruto, those registration forms have to be completed and signed by an academy teacher." Uchiha didn't need to use the Sharingan for their eyes to be frightening. Their jet-black eyes could be nightmarish in and of themselves. For Naruto, their piercing stare was as impossible to resist as any Tsukoyomi.

"Are you an academy teacher, Naruto?"

Sakura, who had been watching the exchange on the side had suddenly realized something. For all the theories about the Uchiha having been given control over Konoha's official police force to placate or control them, there must have been another element .

Uchiha were just really good cops. If the small puddle of sweat accumulating by Naruto's feet was anything to go by.

"Well...no... bu-"

"So you're forging official documents then?"

"Wait, its not like its a secret or anything! How come nobody told me earlier I wasn't supposed to do this stuff! And how come YOU'RE the first one to notice?!" Sasuke smirked in satisfaction. The smirk turned to a grin. The grin turned to a smile, and the smile turned toothy.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHA." He laughed. Sasuke Uchiha had laughed. His laugh was more maniacal than any made-for-TV movie villain's could ever hope to have been. The fact that it was not only real, but incredibly loud, probably ruined any chance of villagers getting over their fear of him.

Worth it, Sasuke reasoned.

"Uh, Sasuke, are you okay?" The until-now uninvolved medic-nin poked the fit-driven Sasuke's head in fascination as the man continued his deranged laughing. She was worried he wasn't breathing as he slipped to his knees, unable to support himself in his mania.

Suddenly, he stopped his cackling, but only after attracting the attention of what seemed like the entire village. He noticed some shinobi peering down at he group from atop several buildings, probably worried some absurdly powerful villainous figure had entered their village. They weren't too far from the truth.

The Uchiha quickly stood up and with a stone-like expression turned to face his blonde compatriot.

"Naruto..." Sasuke closed the short distance between them and placed a hand on Naruto's as his pure black eyes met Naruto's wide-open blue ones.

"You are the most gullible dobe I have ever met."

The sound of an angry fox chasing a cackling snake was heard throughout Konoha for the rest of the day.

At least Sasuke had something to do.

...

* * *

...

Of course Sasuke's days weren't all fun and games. He was finally both old and not in prison enough to take control of his family's estate. With his pockets now bursting at the seams filled with all the liquidated assets of an enormous noble clan, Sasuke bought the site of his childhood home, and set to work rebuilding the place.

By hiring a medium-sized army of tradespeople. But until it was finished Sasuke would have to find a more temporary place to stay.

The presedential suite of the Leaf Luxury Resort would have to do.

Oh the sacrifices he had to make...

***Knock*Knock*Knock***

Speaking of which, it seemed the room service was here with his dinner. Now Sasuke would have to get up and walk all the way to the door. What a drag.

As the unfortunate Uchiha made his arduous trek to the door, he noticed a pair of familiar chakra signatures on the other side, and sure enough. As he opened the door...

"Hey Sasuke!"

It was dumb and dumber. Again. And they didn't come unarmed, for in each pair of arms there was an enormous stack of textbooks.

"So, we know you have your exam tomorrow, and Kakashi-sensei thought it would be a good idea if you spent the evening studying!" Sasuke was sure Naruto's face was about to explode with the laughter he was so desperately trying to keep in. If only he could see his face past the tower of paper.

The blob of pink hair sitting above the the comparative histories of the major hidden villages spoke next.

"Come on Sasuke, let's get started studying, you wouldn't want to fail would you?" The blob spoke, confident of his ability to pass an exam designed for twelve year olds (as long as he studied).

Naruto and the blob muscled their way past Sasuke into the suite, setting their payloads down on top of a gwooden coffee table. It turned out the blob was none other than Sakura Haruno.

"Iruka-sensei gave me an exam lesson plan for you, so let's go over it, you follow along Naruto." Sakura smartly pulled out a small booklet and flipped it open.

"Aww but Sakura, I don't even remember reading any of these things in the academy..." Naruto peered over at the textbook on top of the nearest pile.

"That's probably because you didn't read any dobe." Sasuke was right of course. He was always right. He even said so himself.

"Oh yeah? Well I still passed, and you're the one that has to retake the exam teme!" The blonde confidently crossed his arms.

"Yes dobe, you _barely_ passed after failing 3 times. I think you'll make an excellent tutor for someone who aced the exam the first time around." The Uchuha relaxed into a couch beside the coffee table, smirking at his rival.

"You trying to start something teme?"

"I don't know dobe, with you bringing up my academic success I just thought it appropriate to bring up your failure."

"SHUT. UP. AND. READ. BOTH OF YOU!" Sakura threw a book into each boys face with all of her practiced strength.

The sound of hard cover textbooks breaking noses masked a light knocking on a door.

"Room service, mister Uchiha."

...

* * *

...

"Arrrrrrgh this is ridiculous!" Naruto slammed his face into another open textbook, but it only served to muffle his cries of frustration. In his years as a ninja Naruto had gotten better at a lot of things. Studying wasn't one of them.

"How can they expect anyone to memorize all this crap?! You don't need to know any of this to be a ninja!" The blonde dramatically threw his textbook at the pile.

He jumped on top of the table, knocking over Sasuke and Sakura's books.

"What the hell are you doing dobe?" Sasuke sighed, he had been doing this for four hours now.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU NARUTO?!" Sakura jumped up, and Sasuke knew this wouldn't end well.

"WHEN I'M HOKAGE, I'M GONNA MAKE SURE NO KID EVER HAS TO SUFFER THROUGH THIS A...gain..." The blonde's conviction wavered as the cracking of knuckles was heard coming from his pink-haired teammate.

"Naruto. Pick up your book and sit down." The kunoichi's voice was disturbingly even, and her eyes were shut closed. Naruto knew better than to argue with her.

"Yes ma'am." The blonde spoke more quietly than Sasuke had ever heard him speak and retrieved his book from off the floor.

Sasuke decided he had had just about enough of 'Team Seven study time' which just involved Naruto complaining while Sakura occasionally beat him. So far Sasuke wasn't learning , except that Naruto was still afraid of reading and that Sakura was every bit as violent as her reputation suggested.

He decided to speak his mind. That never went wrong.

"Sakura. I think that's enough studying. The dobe's brain might melt if he keeps reading."

"Yeah Sak- HEY WAIT A MINUTE!" Said dobe's brain nearly missed the insult entirely. Maybe it really would melt.

Sakura sweat dropped at that.

"Well I suppose so. Come on Naruto, Sasuke needs his sleep."

"Aww but Sakura, I didn't even get to use he hot tub!"

"GRAB THE BOOKS NARUTO!" Sakura yelled as she already had a pile of textbooks in her hands.

"Alright alright, sheesh." Naruto grabbed the remaining pile before following Sakura out the door.

"Bye teme!"

* * *

*** The un-patented Uchiha Cop-Stare Jutsu. It's pretty much a kekkei genkai, as not only is it inherited, but only the Uchiha can pull it off without external aids such as aviator sunglasses or a moustache.**

**Did you enjoy that Team Seven interaction? 'Course you did. If you're wondering about Sasuke let me explain: Sakura/Tsunade = short-tempered but caring medics**

**Naruto/Jiraiya = reckless, lecherous crusaders for peace.**

**Sasuke/Orochimaru = insane slippery-snakes**

**So simple it makes your brain hurt.**

**And by the way, THE COVER IS REAL**

**Leave a review. And have a wonderful day.**


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